The Finale

“Dare you to move….Dare you to mov..(stop)”. My hand is quick enough to reach to my cell phone and turn off the alarm. Its only 7 am and the sky is still dark here. I toss around my bed for a few more times, its part of my bad habit that never change. Feeling satisfied, I finally sit up on my bed, but my whole body is tired due to the aftermath of sleepless night. I wrap my hands around my face and sigh. I know this will come but I still chose not to sleep. Without wasting anytime, I go into the bathroom for hot shower. After showering, I wipe the mirror which is covered with water vapour due to the condensation and I stare at myself for awhile. The longer I look at myself, the more freak out I am. “Today is the day!” I told myself. I change into a white ‘slim fit’ stripes shirt and a pair of dark ‘coated’ skinny jeans. I take some time to groom myself with ‘Osis+’ matt gum. After I got down from the flat where I live, I look around…having no love to this place, I walk straight to leave this ‘dump’ area. Colour of the sky starts to change from dark into dark blue but no car is yet to be seen on the street. Air is still cool and fresh. It’s a perfect condition to jog I tell myself. As I walk and walk, my surrounding also becomes brighter and brighter due to the rising sun. The sun is making ‘its’ own presence known to everyone by lasering the bright and heated UV light to the surface. This also means that the appearance of people and cars are increasing exponentially. Life here is really congested…but who cares. I have reached my destination, a run-down apartment that is sited at a higher terrain not far from the ‘dump’ site. Up to the rooftop I go, where I can see the most beautiful view of the city. After enjoying this view for the last time, I decided, its time now! I reach into my pocket to take out my cell phone and I make a call to her. Duu duut! Duu Duut! Duu Du… “Hello?” A girls voice who is obviously awaken by the phone ring pick up the call. “Hello, Kathy, sorry to wake you up early in the morning but there is something that I have been always wanted to tell you.” Not allowing her to interrupt, I continue “I just want to thank you for being such a good friend of mine. You never failed to care for me from the first day we met. You are patient, sweet and humble, that’s what I really like about you.” “Ohh thanks Sam. That is so sweet of you but you don’t have to tell me this in this hour.” Her voice is soft and tendering with care that can melt my heart every time I listen it.
“…Kathy, listen, this is the last thing I wana say to you…” I held breath,
“Ani Ohev Otach!”
“Sam….”
“Good bye, Katherine.”
I quickly press the ‘end’ call button and switch off my cell phone. Take a deep breath again and I close my eyes.

I jump off from the edge of the rooftop.

chap 9

I was walking alone around my usual spot, where I sat this morning, during evening time. I can’t focus on anything that I was about to do because in my mind, I am just thinking about one thing…. Yea you should be able to guess that. “It’s called secret!” I recalled back the conversation this morning. I smiled when I thought of this conversation. She is mysterious indeed but I really enjoy her accompany though we only met a few times. Tap tap tap, that’s the sound of my stick hitting the ground as I walk along. I know that area very well as I had been walking there for 8 years but I did it for purpose in hope that ‘she’ will know that I am here. Another reason why I was walking here is not to clear my mind like what I did this morning but, just hoping that I can bump into her ‘coincidently’ again. The front of me is a little quiet boy but the back of me is the master of evil plan. As the wind blows, I felt a bit cold. Usually, the temperature drop as sunset during autumn. I can hear leaves flying all over the ground. “Ahh crap”, I curse myself forgetting to bring my jacket out. I debate for awhile whether I should go back or wait a little while, but finally I give up as I can’t stand the cold and go back. “Huhhh!” I sighed as I reach my room. Yea I was a bit disappointed because I couldn’t meet her. Oh well, maybe today isn’t my day. I lean my stick against the wall, next to the door. Still feeling cold from the outside, I decided to drink a cup of hot chocolate. Hot chocolate in a cold day, what a good combination. After pouring the hot chocolate into a cup, I take a sip before I sit on my favourite chair. I start to think about her. What is she doing now? Is she still in the orphan house or she gone home already? I can feel that my heart is uneasy and I regretted that I should have stay a bit longer. If I just stay for 5 minutes, maybe she will appear! From that moment, I kept blaming myself for being no so patient. I take another sip, knowing that I should clear my mind now or else I will become a maniac. Suddenly I heard door knock “Tuk tuk”.
“Who is it?” I asked.
“It’s me, Jamie.”

chap 8

“Hey…”

I suddenly felt someone tapping on my shoulder.

“Do you know who am I?”

“Let me guess, Jaime is it?” I teased.

“No, its Mariah Carey silly” Jamie laughed.

“Yea I know that. So how do you know I am here?”

“Ohh, because I saw you sitting here while I was planning to take some fresh air before starting my work. So what are you doing here anyway?”

“Nothing much. Just trying to re lax and enjoy this place.”

“Ahh I see. So you like this place huh!”

I nodded. “Yea. I just love the peacefulness here. It’s the time where I can just stop thinking about what’s going on around me and… you know just relax.”

“I agree, because I myself also felt the same way like you did!”

Wow now her answers really surprise me. I can do no more but smile to her.

“Am I disturbing you now? I mean do you mind if I just sit down and have a little chat with you?” she asked.

“Yea, sure.”

As she took her sit, she started, “Ooh I just love the weather right now. It’s not too hot and cold either. It’s just cool.”

“Yea I like it too.”

I can feel her warm body and her perfume as she sat right next to me. With that only I realize how close we are to each others.

“Say Sam, can I ask you something?”

“Err yea sure.”

“Do you have a dream?”

“Huh, errr why do you ask?”

“I don’t know, because I always saw you shaking your legs everyday.”

“Was that a tease and since when you notice me so much?”

“Yes that was a tease and no I won’t answer you that first. Now back to the question.”

I could hear her giggled.

Ahh crap, now only I have to admit that girl ruled.

“All right, you win. Well I do have a dream. I have always wanted to meet my parents again. Ok now it’s your turn then.”

“Oooo I never say I will tell you my dream.”

“Ahhh COME on!”

“Do you really want to know?”

“Give me a big yes.”

chap 7

I wake up early in the morning the next day to start my daily routine again. Drinking a glass of cold milk will refresh my day, definitely. Beans and bacons are my favourite breakfast. Mmmmm I just can’t live without them. After having my breakfast alone, as always, I head straight to my usual spot, the bench that is located right in front of the orphan. I like that place because it’s sort of like a small park and it’s always quiet and peaceful early in the morning. During this time, I can have all the peace that I want before I start my day. It has been a habit for me to do this or else, I will feel uncomfortable for the rest of the day. Usually, after I sit down, the first thing I do is to clear my mind from anything and start to enjoy the sound of nature. Ahhh how beautiful it is listening to the bird singing, away from construction or traffic or whatever sounds that is made by human. It’s just me and the Mother Nature. But strange, I just can’t focus this morning, I mean I just can’t get my head clear from everything. I kept…..I kept thinking about yesterday. To be specific, I am thinking….Jamie. Now now, there is nothing so special about it. It’s just a normal maybe so-called friendship tea. She will forget about you after that. But the only thing that really disturb my head is that, why she want to be my friend and why am I so happy about this friendship? And how does she know me anyway? The first time we met was only less than… I don’t know, a figure that can be count with one hand.

chap 6

“By the way Sam, can I ask you one question?”
“Ermm yea, sure!” It took me a few seconds before I can answer her because I am just wondering what kind of question she is going to ask me
“Do you have any friends?”
“I think…no. Why would you ask?” I lowered down my voice.
“I see. Sorry to say this but I notice that you were always alone ever since I came here to work!”
I paused for a moment before answering her as I am trying to search for the right word.
“…Well that’s because I don’t usually hangout with them.”
“Why don’t you?”
Man this girl is tough!
“It’s a long story. Let’s just say I prefer to be alone if I were asked to join them.” I tried to give her a smile.
“I see.What about me? What if I ask you out, will you prefer to stay alone or go out with me?”
What the….! Ok, now I am stuck. Should I just say ‘yes’ because honestly, I can feel that she bring no harm to me and I just feel…comfortable with her. Ouwww whatever!
“Yea, sure!... Why not.”
“Hehe ok, I will take that as your promise ok. No running away from me yea!”
“Hahaha” Why am I laughing? “So is that a sign of friendship?” I asked.
“Yes it is my friend!”
“Thanks. I really appreciate that. Seriously!”
“Ahhh, that’s ok. I am happier to be your friend haha! Opps, forgot to look at the time. I think we better go now because it’s getting late and yea, I know about the curfew in your place.” said Jamie after looking at her watch.
“Right. By the way…. thanks for spending time with me!”
Oh my gosh, I can feel my blush is shining bright on my face.“You’re welcome. Come on’ lets go

chap 5

It’s around evening time when we reach there, just my guessing. As we take our seats, I suddenly hear a voice; “May I take your order?” That should be the waiter and they really have quick hands and feet. “Coffee please.” Said Jamie. “And you sir?” “Errmmm tea will do.” I answered. After the waiter left, Jamie asks;
“You don’t drink coffee, Mr Harris?”
“Ermm, no. Not really. By the way, just call me Samuel…I mean Sam.”
“Haha alright Sam. Anyway, my name is Jamie Larter, I hope you still remember? Sorry, I didn’t really introduce myself that day because it’s sure it was a busy day.”
“Ohh, right…that’s ok!”
Hahhh, now that’s better. At least she has answered my next question, which is quite embarrassing. But still, I am feeling a bit weird because I am actually talking to someone that I don’t really know. Sort of like a stranger to me!
“So how’s your day, Sam?”
“Ermm fine, I guess!”
“I see. Glad to hear that. So how long you have been staying in this orphanage place?”
“Bout 8 years I guess.”
“Wow, that is long. So do you like your place?”
“I…got no comment for now!” I shook my head; don’t know how to answer her.
“Haha, well I sort of like your place, because it’s a new environment to me. And i…..”
And there goes our conversation. Though I don’t really know how to talk, she is patient enough to continue talking to me to keep the conversation alive. It’s amazing that we have been talking for more than 1 hour. I just don’t know how describe it, but for the first time; there are actually people who are willing to spend time with me. Of course I feel weird and shy but I am actually having…fun even though she did most of the talk!

Chap 4

Knock, knock! Huh someone is knocking my door. “Ohhh Mr Harris, are you free now?” From her sound, I guess that is Jamie or Jaime, oh whatever. “Errr I guess so!” I answered. “Great, I was getting a bit bored here so do you mind going out for a drink?” Jamie or Jaime is new the staff who volunteered herself to work in this place. I hardly know her because I only talk to her once and that’s when she accidentally bumped into me, and I have to admit that I have forgotten her name. But one thing that really question me is that, why would she ask me out for a drink? I am not close to her and she is not close to me! Maybe this is what they called ‘being friendly’. “Errrmmmm I guess….ok!” Am I doing the right thing? “How about Stanley’s café? I heard people said the coffee is nice!” she asked.

“Well errrr… sure. Ok!” From my tone, I can hear that I am very nervous each time I answer her but don’t blame me for that because I had been living alone all this while, and of course my social skill is bad.

In the end I have no choice but to go out with her! So is that a good thing or a bad thing?

chap 3

As soon as I reach my room, I lay on my bed and start to think about the past. The autumn wind had refreshed my mind again. It’s been 8 years since I was saved and brought into this orphan house. Orphan? Huh am I an orphan? No, I think they made a mistake. I still have a family and they are somewhere outside of this place. I am sure my parents are still alive and they will come and find me soon, just…soon. My life hasn’t changed much. I am still suffering depression and rejection. Though I am no longer a slave to anyone but still, I am…alone! I just felt very empty in this world and I don’t know why I am still live on. I can do nothing and I worth nothing! Why Death didn’t take me along with him at that time? And what’s the meaning of “Not Yet!”? Well, all I know is that I have been living here for 8 years and most of the orphans from my batch have been adopted except for me. “Sorry but I don’t think I want my child to be blind because I can’t afford it. It will take too much of my time just to take care of it.” I was hiding in a corner and cried when I heard that. “Why me? Why it has to be me?” I will cry an ask myself. But it’s true; you can hardly find people that will adopt a handicap child. Again, I was…rejected.

chap 2

“So how long you have been living in the Sun Shine Orphan?” the interviewer continues with his question. “About 10 years before I move out!” I answer back. “Wow, so that’s mean you started your own business since you were 20 years old? That is amazing Mr Harris. I am so excited and I can’t wait to ask you more about it. But before we continue on, why we don’t take a 5 first ok!” “Alright then.” I answered. As the light turn off, I can hear many of the audience are clapping and cheering. I am impressed with cheering atmosphere in this talk show. Most of the audience give their full cooperation and I think that is why the talk show can survive until now. Speaking of ‘survive’….I was saved from the near death incident. Well I wasn’t really being saved but my time hasn’t come yet. As I was lying motionless in front of the Death, I felt scared, sad but happy at the same time because I was about to leave this harsh and cruel world. The only thing that I would regret was that I see death as the first image that appears in my sight, instead of my parents who I really love. So I just wish I could see them even for just one second or at least I could hear their voice, was more than enough. Suddenly, all the eerie sound stop and a deep harsh voice was heard, “Not Yet!” The next thing I know when I woke up was, I am still alive and I was in Sun Shine Orphan already. Some Good Samaritan saved me and brought me here.

read it when you are free!

….As the stars shine brightly in the dark sky, it was the best moment of my life sitting right next to you. You gave me wings, and made me fly. You lifted me up so I could touch the stars. I lost my hope and you gave it back to me. There is no star that I couldn’t reach because you are the star that shines brightly in my darkest night. You are my shelter, my hope and….my love…

Jamie

It was a sunny day, I guess, with soft winds blowing all around the places. Seasons started to change from summer to autumn. Here I am, sitting alone on a bench just in front of the place where I stay with my favourite sun glasses on. As I closed my eyes and look up to the sky, all I could see was pitch darkness. Not even a single light appear in my vision. I don’t think this is caused by my sun glasses. People always told me that they can still see a glimpsed of sunlight even if they closed their eyes. Well it has proven that I am different from them. While I was enjoying the wind blowing towards me, I can feel people are walking pass by. Though I can’t see them, but I can feel that most of them were families. “Hah family!” I laugh when I thought about it. After I have taste enough of the wind, I decided to go back to my place. I grabbed my stick and used it to guide me back to my place. Though the wind was great, but I was disappointed because I was unable to enjoy the beauty of the nature scene.

“Now why do you laugh when you thought about family?” asked the interviewer. “Well, it’s because I never really had a family before!” I laughed. This question really reminds me of my past. When I was born, I didn’t have the chance to look at my parents face because I was….blind. But my parents still love me with all their hearts. I can feel it even though I understand. After 4 years of nurturing me, my parents decided to go for mission trip in Africa. “Be a good boy ok and auntie Angel will take good care of you. We will be back in few days time. Love you son!” giving me the last kissed on my forehead before they head off. After they left, there were no news about them anymore and they never came back. This incident becomes mystery to everyone. My aunt only told me that my parents won’t be coming back so early. As 4 years old boy, of course I couldn’t understand a thing. But my life starts to change under the care of my aunt. The name Angel does not suit my aunt at all. For her, I am just a burden. Who am I? A boy, who is blind, can’t walk properly and need care all the time! Who in the world would have so much time to take care of a blind orphanage? But sometimes, I think she was right, I am a burden to her! Though I was young, but I had learnt to be independent. I had to feed myself because no one will come and feed me. Life wasn’t easy at all as I was enslaved by my second ‘family’. Who cares if you were blind! If you want food, then you have to work for it. But my slavery year ends after 6 hellish years as my ‘family’ hated me so much that they kicked me out from the house. I guess that will be worst experience in my life, wandering around the world that is filled with cruelty. Starvation, thirst, depression and unloved, all strike me at once until a point that I couldn’t take it anymore and I collapsed in the middle of nowhere. While lying on the ground, my heart cried out for my parents. “Where are you? Where…are you? I need you!” tears weren’t able to come out from my eyes because I was lack of water in my body. Well my only wish at that time was to see my parents for the last time. Suddenly, a figure coated in black suit appeared in my vision. The figure was very obvious in my sight though I can’t see. It’s walking slowly towards me and I could hear an eerie sound coming out from it. “Arghhhhhh! Please take me out of here! Ahhhhhhh! Let me out, I am begging you! Ouhhhahhhhhh….” All sorts of crying and shouting was heard. It seems like people were begging from this figure for something. At that time, I couldn’t understand what is this all about but as the figure stop right in front of me, only I realize it was…Death? Is this the end of my life?